Sunday, March 16, 2014

Luck



Do you believe in luck or something giving you luck? 
Well, I don't know if I necessarily believe in luck but I'm afraid not to because what if there is such a thing?  I always make sure that horseshoes are turned up just in case my luck falls out the bottom.  I pick up pennies on the ground, "Find a penny, pick it up. All day long, you'll have good luck.".  If I see a black cat on the road I pray that it won't run in front of me and certainly never walk under a ladder because that may cause you bad luck.  I did break a mirror one time and that may have caused some of the bad things to happen in my life but I'm not sure.
As you can see I'm not going to hurt my chances of good because Lord knows I've had my share of bad luck.  I do have a necklace that I wear everyday and have since my son Trent died.  My friends gave it too me just a few days after his accident.  It's a silver necklace that is the size of a quarter and it has his initials engraved in it, TJCS(Trenton John Clair Shrontz).
It mostly just gives me comfort not necessarily good luck.  I can feel the initials on it when I rub it with my fingers.  The initials are getting fainter and fainter as each year passes.  When I first got it I would rub it whenever I was feeling like I couldn't handle the turmoil going on inside of me but now it's less and less. I guess I know it's just there and I can handle what got dealt to me.  (understand it? no)
The funny thing about this necklace is that I've almost lost it twice.  Once when the chain got so wore that it broke and the charm fell off.  Luckily I found it in my bedspread later that day after I had a bit of a panic attack. 
The second time I lost it was the day that my daughter Ashley got married.  I decided to take the charm off and put it on my bracelet so that I could wear a heart necklace.  It was a beautiful August day with a few clouds drifting lazily in the blue sky.  Ashley wanted to honor her brother that day because it was difficult to celebrate without him.  So, down the aisle she hung pictures of her and Trent as they grew up together.  Trent, though was there that day I am sure because just as the horse and wagon was bringing the bridal party down the lane to the ceremony site there in the sky was a cloud that was shaped like a heart.  Some people would say that it was a coincidence but not our family we were sure he was there with us!  Anyway as we celebrated the wondrous event into the early hours of the next morning  I discovered that Trent's charm was no longer on my bracelet.  The only thing that remained was the loop.  I was sure that it was gone and maybe it was time to let it go.  Resigned to that fact I was surprised when the neighbor girl was doing a once through the bouncy house (oh yes we had a bouncy house!  Our only daughter and only child we had one heck of a celebration!) checking for anything left behind and low and behold she found Trent's charm. 
Right away I put it back around my neck.  You can  call that luck or coincidence I'm not sure what but I'm not going to question it.  So, I will continue to wear Trent's charm until it's completely wore out, pick up pennies, avoid black cats, and make sure that my horseshoes are turned up so my luck won't run out. 

3 comments:

  1. Glad that your charm found it's way back to you! Bittersweet was the feeling your words left upon me. I am glad that your daughter found a way to bring your son to her wedding.

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  2. Kris, your writing gets me every time, right in the heart. I didn't really know Trent, but I love that I'm getting to know him, and you, through your stories. You have a gift and I'm so glad you have decided to share it...even if it makes me teary sometimes. :)

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  3. I can only imagine your panic when losing it once, but twice! So glad it got back home around your neck each time. I have to echo Robin and say I love hearing these stories about Trent. I always knew he was a special kid but your stories bring his heart and your heart together through your writing.

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